Do real men get depression?
Absolutely! Real men get depressed! A lot of us think of the depressed person as the tearful woman, lying in bed with swollen eyes, finishing off her second box of Kleenex. This may be the case for some, but this is NOT what I have seen from most men.
When depressed, both men and women may feel blue, feel extremely tired, have difficulty sleeping, and find it difficult to get pleasure from activities that they once enjoyed. But, there are many other behaviors in men that could be signs of depression – even if they aren’t usually seen as such.
Depressed men often:
Show escapist behaviors: spend a lot of time at work or on sports
Drink excessively
Abuse drugs
Feel and/or show irritability or inappropriate anger
Use risky behaviors such as driving recklessly and participating in dangerous sports
Have physical pain or symptoms, such as backaches and frequent headache
Differences between male and female depression
Women Tend To:
Blame themselves
Feel sad, apathetic, and worthless
Feel anxious and scared
Feel Slowed down or nervous
Have trouble setting boundaries
Find it easy to talk about self-doubt and despair
Use food, friends, and “love” to self-medicate
Men Tend To:
Blame Others
Feel angry, irritable, and ego inflated
Feel suspicious and guarded
Feel restless and agitated
Need to feel in control at all costs
Find it “weak” to admit self-doubt or despair
Use alcohol, TV, sports, and sex to self-medicate
(Adapted from: Male Menopause by Jed Diamond)
While there is no evidence that women experience higher rated of depression, men account for one in ten diagnosed cases of depression (Mental Health America, 2007). Many say that this is because men don’t like to ask for help, but I think this is just the tip of the iceberg. It’s rather difficult to recognize that you have depression if sadness is not your primary symptom. It’s very common for other symptoms like headaches, fatigue, irritability and feeling isolated to be more prevalent than sadness.
So, to all the REAL men who related to these symptoms of depression, I double-dog-dare you to do something about your depression! Call a therapist and/or talk to your doctor. You don’t have to continue to feel this way.
